Leading by example vs Actively teaching

As parents, we strive to be the best role models for our children, showing them through our actions what they can achieve. Our accomplishments can inspire and encourage them, providing a powerful hint of what is possible. However; simply setting an example is not enough. To truly impart our knowledge and experiences, we must actively teach our children what we know.

Being skilled at something and having a child interested in that same skill requires us to take on the role as a mentor. It's not enough to hope they will learn by observation alone; we must guide them step-by-step, sharing our insights and experiences. Expecting them to excel without this guidance can leave them unprepared and frustrated.

Research supports the idea that active teaching is essential for effective learning. According to Vygotsky's Social Development Theory, children learn best through guided interaction with more knowledgeable individuals (Vygotsky, 1978). This means that as parents, we need to engage directly with our children to help them internalize new skills and knowledge.

Positive parenting involves creating a legacy of authentic, positive experiences for our children. This means engaging with them in meaningful ways and imparting our knowledge deliberately. For instance, if you are adept at managing finances, it's crucial to sit down with your child and teach them the basics of financial management. Without this hands-on instruction, they won't gain the experience and knowledge they need to succeed.

In her book "The Gift of Failure," Jessica Lahey emphasizes the importance of allowing children to learn through experience and direct teaching. She argues that children need both the freedom to explore and the guidance to understand complex tasks. This balanced approach helps them develop resilience and competence.

Expecting your child to inherit your skills and abilities without active teaching is unrealistic. Take the time to nurture their growth by sharing what you know. Teach them the best versions of yourself, your goals, and your dreams. Whether in small steps or detailed lessons, your guidance will ensure that your legacy is a fruitful one.

Our goal as parents is to leave a positive and lasting impact on our children's lives. By actively becoming their lifelong mentor , we can ensure that they are well-equipped to succeed and thrive, carrying forward the lessons we have imparted.